Dirty Vodka Martini

Dirty Vodka Martini     

    (Shaken, Not stirred) 
this is my favorite drink before a steak dinner

Kettle One Vodka
olive juice
crushed ice
stainless shaker

fill shaker with crushed ice
pour a few table spoons of olive juice in shaker
add vodka
 Shake like hell 
(the crushed ice against the stainless shaker creates beautiful little ice shavings)
garnish with olives & drink immediately

(My father-in-law, who is a master gardener,  actually picked these olives at his friend's house and processed them in his bathtub, which appeals to my Southern-sensibility, in a charming, red-neck sort of way) Next step is bathtub moonshine, XXX! Many experiment with jalapeno-stuffed, blue-cheese stuffed and other gourmet olives. Knock yourself out, I prefer old-school pimento stuffed olives because I am a salt-fiend.

Two years ago I met David, a producer form Manchester, England while I was photographing an event in Hawaii (what a bragger I sound like). He and I instantly bonded over our love of irreverent literature, pink Himalayan salt and off-beat liquor.  By the end of the trip we were convinced that we were separated at birth and decided we were in fact brother and sister.  There was, however, an unexpected hiccup in our new-found familial same-same-ness.  He offhandedly asked--as if to confirm my non-philistine standing--: "Do you like your martinis shaken or stirred?" Never suspecting this was a trap, I gladly offered that I not only preferred them shaken, but shaken to death. He was crestfallen at what he obviously deemed as a sad departure in my otherwise good taste. However, I stand proudly firm with Bond, James Bond, and like them shaken like hell.  Some say shaking can "bruise" the spirit. I think vodka isn't quite that delicate, come on.  Call me pedestrian but I think vodka with ice shavings diaphanously floating about, does not lack imagination, but celebrates this drink's strong, icy, salty simplicity.  Granted, while I am making this drink, the scene of my vigorous shaking  is what can only be described as an arm-flab extravaganza.

The Back Story.......I moved to Philadelphia in the late 90's, and was shortly thereafter introduced to this drink: Kettle One, extra dry, extra dirty, extra olives, by my boyfriend. I was hooked.  Before you judge my version of the vodka martini, you should know that I have read all the damning evidence. I know there are those, with their laudably cultured pallets, who will claim that those of us who drink them "extra-dry"  have sadly fallen prey to the "Machismo" movement of the 50's. Ahhh the 50's, when the drink-martinis-at-lunch corporate set "ruined" the drink of yore by equating their masculinity with the dryness of their martini.  Yes, perhaps these people were advertising their shrewd business persona by leaving off the elegant addition of vermouth.  Not to worry, I am neither masculine, nor a shrewd business woman.  AND, I have since discovered the beauty of vermouth in other cocktails, even straight. But, as for my martinis, I am sticking to my guns, my flabby, martini-shaking guns.

CHEERS!

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